Strange.

I feel strange today. I have this feeling of anticipation, like I am missing something or had something I needed to accomplish and cannot remember what it was. I am a little bummed as well. Not because I am home. Trust me, I am elated to be home. Ecstatic. My game has just been thrown off. Being home is completely different from being in Africa.

It was easily 80 degrees or warmer every single day. We had air conditioning in our hotel room and the main meeting hall, but any other minute of the day, we were experiencing African heat to the fullest. Here, it is cold and our house is comfortable. I am not sure if I miss the heat, exactly; however, after eleven days of it, I will be careful to not complain when I have to deal with it here at home. And you can bet, I will be thinking about the missionaries every day this summer when Lexington heat hits... if it is anything like last summer. When we travelled by bus (our four hour drive from Mangochi to Lilongwe), our air conditioning came from the open windows. I actually loved it. I was getting used to being hot.

I also had no "housewife responsibilities" while we were gone. Maybe that is contributing to my feelings of anticipation: I have to get this house back in order. There is so much to do. Obviously, that is why I am bummed. B

I think I am bummed, also, because our life will go back to the way it was and I am not quite looking forward to that. Maybe I just miss Africa. It is not "maybe".. it is "I definitely miss Africa". Chandler will appreciate knowing that.

Except I do not miss eating the same thing every day and I am way happy to have access to sweet tea and my favorite foods. And I was more than happy to take a hot shower with great water pressure and straighten my hair; although, I learned to love my curls and the ease with which I could just get out of the shower, throw in some curling mousse, and go. Then have fabulous looking hair once it dried.. which it did fairly quickly. That is probably it, though.

I miss the fellowship with the missionaries. I am surprised at the relationships we built in such a short amount of time. I am surprised that I miss some of them as much as I do. Their hearts were so genuine; more so than what I have experienced here at home. I think it is mainly due to the fact that they have to totally, completely, every minute of every day rely on the Lord. They have nothing if they do not lean totally on Him. Absolutely nothing; and they know it. It is incredible. I do not want to forget that. I do not want to forget their desperate need for His hand. But I can... it will be all too easy to forget. My life is easy. But I will think about them often. They have left an indelible impression.

So, I think life will feel weird for a couple of days. I do not like it, but maybe it is a good thing. Maybe it is the Lord's way of reminding me of last week, reminding me to pray for the missionaries and for ourselves and our future. If so, then I am okay with it.